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Good, grief.

This morning my mom called. She had called me late last night but I was asleep. This morning she called again and I instantly knew something was off. I woke up this morning expecting to have a great day just because I went to bed at a good time the night before and woke up and made a smoothie. I've always hated Mondays, a lot of the worse days of my life or most frustrating days seemed to be on Mondays. Today was no different. I called my mom back and she begin to tell me that my cousin Edward aka "Junior" died last night. Not only did he die but he died in the basement of my Aunts, his mom's house. The same place my other cousin Eric died 5 years ago. They were brothers, Eric was the youngest. I was heartbroken and instantly broke out in tears. Eric was one of my favorite cousins on my mom's side of the family, we shared a love for art. When he died just 8 days after I moved to Dallas, I was devastated. I moved to Dallas on July 7, 2017, and he died on July 15th.
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Hello 2023: God is Faithful.

First, let me start by saying Happy New Year!!!!!! I pray this year is a blessed year for you and your family. I pray for God to show up in your life to remind you that He is always near to His own. I know I had to continue to remind myself of that truth in 2022 and for the rest of my life, it will be engraved on my heart. I'm so thankful that no matter what happens in this life when we place our faith and trust in God He is able to sustain us through the most difficult times in life. I don't know about you but 2022 was a difficult season for me. And I say season because I knew that a lot that took place would cause a shift in my norm that would only be for a season, at least I hoped. But I wasn't prepared for all of the coping and suppressing my own feelings it would take to get through it. I was in survival mode all of 2022, kind of similar to how I felt when the pandemic first happened in 2020. I just did what I could to survive and make it to the next day. By the Grace

A God who restores.

Restoration: the action of returning something to a former owner, place, or condition. Psalm 51:12 says "Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit. A familiar prayer, a familiar place.  Restore to me the joy of your salvation. Give me the joy I had when I first got saved. Uphold me with a willing spirit. Help me to willingly surrender my life and desires to you. God is all about restoration. In fact, in the past, present and future He is actively restoring what was lost in the Garden of Eden when Adam and Eve sinned. God sent His only begotten Son to restore our broken relationship with Him. Revelation talks about how He will restore the Earth when Jesus comes back. Acts 3:21 21 Heaven must receive him until the time comes for God to restore everything, as he promised long ago through his holy prophets. Even in our day to day God is in the business of restoring. He is restoring broken relationships, friendships, families, finances, health, hopes,

Count it all Joy

"You can turn it all around, It’s hard to understand sometimes, Is there a master plan? How do I make sense of everything I’m going through? Maybe it’s not ours to know so we have to learn to let things go. And simply try to make the most of every day. And have faith that somehow we will find our way. So count it all joy, All that you’re going through. No matter what you’re going through Even when you’re feeling down Count it all joy, Each moment's a gift to you No matter what you're going through So turn it all around." To listen click here: Count it all joy - Bebe & CeCe Winans I grew up listening to that song and it means more to me now than it did when my parents would play it throughout the house as a kid. My dad would always tell me growing up to “Count it all joy”, now as an adult I can better understand the magnitude of what that means. In James 1:2-4 it says “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because yo

Let yourself be loved ♡

"So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us."  1 John 4:16 Love. We all crave it, we all desire it. We seek after it sometimes in all the wrong places. Yet, it's right in front of us, pursuing us constantly with no hesitations.  When I think about how I've sought after love in the wrong men. How I've sought after love in the wrong spaces and even how I manage to push people that I know love me away out of fear. To know that a perfect being loves me so purely and so much that He chose to die on the cross for me lights a fire in me that I have never felt. To know that He chooses to love me through my fears is everything to me. The last blog I wrote about love and I normally don't talk about this subject publicly that much but for whatever reason this season is making me press into it. To hear about love, want it and seek after it is one thing but to realize that it's already present and active in my life hits differently.

Jesus loves YOU.

Sometimes when I hear something over and over again it starts to become redundant and not as valuable to me as the first time I heard it. I want to expound on that for a moment to remind you of what that means. Jesus loves you. Romans 5:8 But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners , Christ died for us. We are conditioned to feel like we have to work and earn love. As much as we desire to give and receive unconditional love it is a hard task for us as humans. We are conditioned to expect things in return when we give anything to others. This is why the Bible talks about denying self so much because that is exactly what Christ did 2000 years ago for us. While we were dead in our sins, He died for us. Philippians 2:4-8 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness

Vulnerability is Strength ♡

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on m e. That is one of my favorite verses! Gods Grace is sufficient enough to carry us through whatever life throws at us. It is difficult to be vulnerable sometimes and express that we are struggling. Its easier to boast about our strengths rather than our weaknesses. It can be uncomfortable and maybe a little scary to admit that things aren't going well and reach out and ask for help. --- One thing that Im continously learning is that my dependence has to be in Christ. Everything in this world is fleeting, vain and unreliable. Paul knew what hardship looked like, I read about him and wonder how he was able to write letters and encourage others when he was suffering tremendously himself. But God. -- SUFFICIENT = ENOUGH, CONSTANTLY AVAILABLE.